The Month of “Meh”

“Loving something isn't about coveting it:

it is about appreciating it.

The best way we can show this love is by trying to nurture growth,

not inhibit it.”

~ unknown

I've been struggling this month with thinking of things to write about. Personal growth typically goes in phases, and after the past few months I feel like I may be in a bit of a rest phase... which is welcome!

Still it's been a rough month, this month of “meh”.

I have read that there is something happening in the cosmos right now, the alignment of the planets or energy fields in the universe affecting our relationships. Regardless of whether you have an interest or belief in spiritual or astrological theories; I do agree that something has been going on this month. Because it seems there have been too many people I know who have or are continuing to experience struggles in their respective relationships for it to be merely coincidence.

Maybe it's because I have experienced my own relationship struggles. Maybe it's a hazard of my piscean nature. But I hurt every time I hear that someone I care about is hurting because of their relationships. It is part of what is driving me in my career path – not that I claim to be an expert on working to minimize the hurt. Not even a little bit. But I do want to walk along side others in finding, creating, and implementing ways of doing so. I'm sure I have as much if not more to learn from, as to contribute to these conversations.

It is true that each relationship is unique; each relationship's struggles are unique. Thus unique approaches to working through them are likely necessary. But one common contributing underlying factor I often suspect is the danger of “meh”.

In my last relationship, I remember being surprised how quickly it seemed to become “domesticated” - comfortable, almost complacent. It can be all too easy to begin to take for granted this person that you love; the relationship you have built. But the funny thing about love and relationships is that they are not stagnant things. In many ways they are living organisms in need of attention in order to survive. In order to flourish and grow. This seems to be something that most people know on some level and agree about. Yet remembering to follow through and act it out becomes the challenge.

It is inevitable that as individuals we will experience hardships and successes in our life that will lead to change and growth. What is not inevitable is that our partner and/or relationship will change and grow at the same time or in complimentary ways. Sometimes these differences may mean the demise of the relationship. Other times a deeper love and stronger relationship emerges over time from the challenges, from the growth. But this is unlikely without deliberate action and attention.

So let me offer this today to the conversation about nurturing relationships: Step up!

Let's break free from this month of “meh”, and act – before the struggles, challenges, or complacency arise; or in response to them. Do something to let your partner (or friends/family) know that you appreciate them; that you appreciate your relationship. Do it today! Do it tomorrow. Do it next week; next month. Step up and ensure that your relationship is doing more than just surviving. Help it to flourish. It is spring, after all!