I'm gonna love you forever, forever and ever, amen
As long as old men sit and talk about the weather
As long as old women sit and talk about old men
~ Forever & Ever Amen, Randy Travis
After hanging up from a phone call to my parents the other day, I thought to myself “I miss my Mom.” You see Dad had answered the phone.
Typically in the past on the rare occasion that this happened, the conversation would be relatively short-lived. I would ask him about any recent or up-coming trips on the truck; he would ask me how my car was running or how work was going. After a minute or two he would say, “Well your mother's right here, just a second” - and an hour or so later after telling and hearing all the family news that had transpired in the days between phone calls Mom and I would say good bye too.
But in the last few weeks it has been a rare occasion that Mom answers the phone. Instead it is Dad's voice offering an update on how Mom is feeling, what the Dr. said at their last appointment, asking me how my apartment search is going and if I have had any new clients recently.
Because at the end of this round of treatment, Mom's body is run down and she is using all of her energy reserves to recover. Progress reports have been positive! But we are still in the middle of this waiting game – waiting for side effects to subside, waiting for strength and energy to re-build, waiting to see what the next round of treatment will be in the fall, waiting...
Dad said it best the last time I was home and asked how he was doing - “Impatient!”
As often happens in the midst of struggle and challenge, there are hidden gems to find if you look in the right places. Connecting with Dad in this different way – building and strengthening our relationship in order to better support each other through this waiting game and in general – is one I have found!
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The song Forever and Ever Amen by Randy Travis came on the radio the other day, and I thought of my parents. Like I always do when hearing this song. When it got to the lines:
They say time takes it's toll on a body,
Makes the young girl's brown hair turn grey
But honey I don't care, I ain't in love with your hair
And if it all fell out, well I'd love you anyway
it took on a slightly deeper meaning for me. Watching Dad cope in this situation, finding strength inside himself that he maybe never needed before – it is heart-filling! To see his own personal growth, but also to watch the deep love between my parents in action. Nothing short of inspiring...
They say women often find themselves in relationships with men that in some ways resemble their father's character.
I say: I hope so!